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Success does require giving oneself the freedom to pursue challenges and take risks, but it’s not sheer self-confidence alone that we need. I enjoy cheerleading and encouragement as much as anyone, but simply exhorting more effort without first examining and streamlining the underlying fundamental processes at hand, well . . . this brings back bad memories from my previous career as a musician.
For many years I played the double bass with the Boston Pops and other orchestras, and I had the privilege of playing for many top-rate conductors. But I also played for a few misguided maestros. They were convinced that the way to achieve better performance was to simply crank up the emotional energy. They would say things like, “Make it more beautiful!” or the classic, “Okay everybody . . . this time . . . WITH FEELING!!!”
Don’t ask me what these phrases meant. I have no idea.
The phrase “believe in yourself” reminds me of these second-rate conductors. So let’s take a moment to think very calmly, logically, and scientifically about the concept of believing in yourself.
Let’s suppose I suggest that you go out and rob a bank.
You would resist this suggestion, and that resistance would likely be expressed by some version of the phrase, “I could never do that.”
You have an obvious conflict. On a purely practical level, robbing a bank is not that hard. You could acquire a gun easily enough, either legally or illegally. In a minute you could write a note demanding that the teller hand over all the money, and if you don’t own a getaway car, you could easily rent one (or, since you’re already preparing to rob a bank, steal one).
What is stopping you from robbing the bank is not a logistical barrier. It is your knowledge of right and wrong and your appreciation of the risks and possible repercussions. Along with the probability of imprisonment, the looks of disapproval and disappointment from your neighbors, friends and family are, for most people, too terrible to countenance.
