8. Connect through philanthropy Nothing is more empowering for a family than to commit to a cause bigger than individual family members’ agendas, says wealth counselor Jerry D. Nuerge, of the Financial Independence Group in Fort Wayne, Indiana. In preparation for multigenerational family retreats, he asks participants to complete generation-specific questionnaires designed to identify the parents’ passions and illuminate the children’s perspectives. “As family financial advisor, offer to facilitate so the children begin to see you in your advisory role,” he says. “We’ve had families commit to joint trips to third-world countries to build schools and others who create a family foundation to involve their children in their charitable work. In both instances, the key to success is shared responsibility. Parents can put an adult child in charge of an aspect of a large philanthropic endeavor or give a younger child control over $250 a year from the family foundation.”

9. Give a voice to documents. To help children understand that their real inheritance is family values and traditions, Culver encourages families to schedule a retreat to develop a mission statement that addresses family values and philanthropic goals. “Talking only about the will and who will serve as executor focuses on death and loss, but multigenerational philanthropy focuses the discussion on establishing something that lives on,” she says. “To ensure our work isn’t lost, we often suggest inserting text boxes into a client’s legal will where, for example, the founder of a business could talk about the struggle of the early years and how much his business means to him. While this is another opportunity for family to listen and learn from each other, it also helps to have clients’ wishes further expressed and clarified within the four corners of a legal document.”
10. Empower, don’t indoctrinate. Establish yourself as a resource, not an authority, for clients’ children, says Cindy Calderon, a principal at Intrinzia Family Office in Minneapolis. “Young adults don’t want to be treated like children. The way to cultivate a long-term relationship is to help them along the road to financial independence. If you give them tools to make their own decisions, they will choose to come back to you when they need help.”

In Culver’s view, now is an ideal time to try some of these strategies to enhance your clients’ family relationships and lay the foundation for your relationships with your clients’ children. She concludes, “There’s a shift occurring in our practices and our society. People who have achieved financial success are asking themselves, ‘What else is there?’ Similarly, experienced advisors may ask, ‘I’ve helped my client achieve his retirement goals, now what?’ Both client and advisor need to ask ‘What is my legacy?’ Working with that question in mind can have great benefits for families and advance our profession.”

Display article as PDF for printing.

Would you like to send this article to a friend?

Remember, if you have a question or comment, send it to .