Most Popular ArticlesMay 26, 2009
Here’s how Martin Seligman suggests you do that:
Step 1: Analyze your explanatory habits
The next time you have to deal with a negative event or adversity, stop and observe what you are telling yourself about the event. What do you believe about yourself and the reason why bad things happen? To what degree are your explanations personal, permanent or pervasive?
Step 2: Note the consequences of your explanatory style.Â
Pessimistic explanations lead to passivity and dejection. Optimistic explanations lead to energy and hope. Which is more likely to help you get through the current tough period?
Step 3: If you find yourself fighting pessimism, try to change the way you think.
Your future success depends on your ability to rise up and meet adversity with renewed energy and optimism. You can do this by choosing to think differently.
Don’t just tell yourself “This is the way I am – I can’t change.” That’s simply not the case – Seligman’s research says most people struggling with a pessimistic outlook are capable of changing.
Among his suggestions:
Distract your thoughts. When you find yourself thinking negative and pessimistic thoughts, tell yourself to "Stop!" You can even say it out loud. Just "STOP" thinking those things. Shift your thoughts to another topic, perhaps something that brings you pleasure or satisfaction, or something that you're good at.
Dispute your explanations. This is a longer-lasting approach. Argue with yourself and reason your way out of your negative thoughts. Look at the evidence, or suggest alternatives.          Â
Back to our example: "I blew it here. I should have this seen market coming. None of my clients are happy. I’ll probably lose other big accounts too. And I likely won’t land that prospect I’m talking to either. "
When you catch yourself thinking defeatist thoughts, argue with yourself by focusing on the facts.
Think "Wait a minute. It's true I’ve lost this client, but all advisors are losing clients. What is there to suggest I missed something about the market that other people saw coming? I’ve been talking to my key clients recently – is there any evidence that they are unhappy? As for that prospect I’ve been talking to, what signals have I been getting as to whether there is real potential interest there?”
You’ve introduced hard evidence to change your thought processes. As a result of thinking differently, you have more energy, more hope and, therefore, more likelihood of success in the future.
Our thoughts and how we anticipate the future are the most important choices we make. You can change your thoughts, you can choose to think differently and you can choose a different set of beliefs.
More than any other decision, the fundamental choice about how you think affects your future success.
Here is an in-depth New York Times article about Martin Seligman’s work on “learned optimism”
Other articles I have written on strategies to keep a positive mindset:
Ten tips to stay positive
Steps to boost your resiliency
Framing events to increase motivation
The case for long-term optimism
The last resort for achieving motivation
* Dan Richards conducts programs to help advisors gain and retain clients and is an award winning faculty member in the MBA program at the University of Toronto. To see more of his written and video commentaries and to reach him, go to www.strategicimperatives.ca.
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